At this point, it should be fairly apparent that one of my greatest joys in life is a good theme park. But more than that, I love a good weird theme park. Over the past few years I’ve been trying my best to get the big guns of Europe ticked off. Europa Park, Phantasialand, Efteling, done done done. With the continent’s most popular offerings all visited, it’s time to focus my attention on the major parks further from the beaten path. That’s not to say Nigloland is a rare park, god knows I’ve heard so much about this place from other enthusiasts. So much, in fact, that the entire trip that brought us there was based around the singular question ‘How the hell do you get to Nigloland?’
For us, the answer would be a 4-hour drive from Geneva, with a stop at Walibi Rhone-Alpes en route for good measure. There are better options. The park is only 2.5 hours from CDG airport in Paris, but we had no interest in the Paris parks on this trip, so Geneva it was!
Heading out to Nigloland, we passed through some incredible scenery, passing the Alps, endless vineyards and gorgeous small towns as we passed through the French Champagne region, eventually reaching the small town of Bar-sur-Aube and its neighbouring theme park resort!
Despite the seemingly remote location, Nigloland feels like a proper resort from the moment you arrive. Passing a giant statue of the park’s mascot, we pulled into the beautifully landscaped car park lined with enormous trees and benches, resembling more of a park than a car park. Notably, there were no pay machines in sight – parking here is free! The short walk from the car would take us on quite the journey, passing all the attractions lining the park’s boundary. We’d pass giant flowers, insects, and some roaring dinosaur animatronics, whilst in the background the park’s headline rollercoaster Alpina Blitz dominated the skyline.
Though we were visiting a week before the beginning of the park’s ‘Nigloween’ Halloween event, it became apparent as soon as we passed through the front entrance that the park were already ready to go. I cannot emphasise enough how hard Nigloland go for Halloween. Everywhere we looked was decorated, with some decor being substantial custom pieces in the shape of the park mascot! Buildings were embellished with autumnal garlands, pumpkins lined every planter, and most importantly, the park’s mascots were wearing seasonal costumes and meeting at the entrance! Of course, we immediately hopped in the short line for a quick meet and greet to start the day!
With the crowd levels in the park feeling low, we decided to do something I hardly ever do at a theme park, but which felt appropriate for this park, and shove the park map in our backpacks and just explore. With the one proviso that we wouldn’t stop at the first attraction we reached (a pirate ship with an absolutely stacked line that would be empty the next time we passed), we’d follow our feet and see what wonders Nigloland could offer up.
Heading left at the park entrance, we entered ‘Village Canadien’, a densely wooded land filled with beautiful authentic-feeling buildings. Standing isolated, between the forest and a river sat a beautiful creperie, with a large seating area by the water. The decor here was astounding. It even featured its own custom totem pole featuring the park’s mascots!
Wandering without a plan, our first ride of the day would end up being the log flume. This is not a decision I ever make. (Who wants to ruin their hair that early in the day?!) But, the ride looked absolutely stunning, flowing through a heavily wooded area of the park, and was posting a walk-on wait. How could we resist? (Plus, we’d had a good look at the riders, and they didn’t seem that wet!)
River Canadienne may not have been the longest flume ride in the world – it’s very much a one-drop wonder – but what it lacks in duration, it makes up for with stunning scenery and a beautiful station and soundtrack! The woodshop-style station and music made me really feel like I was back at Loggers Leap (forever in our hearts), and the ride left us all soggy but not soaked. A solid flume attraction!
The signage for this entire area of the park was deeply reminiscent of Splash Mountain over at the Disney parks, and this ride was no exception! With a home-carved feel, vivid colours, and cute critters, these signs wouldn’t have gone amiss in Critter Country!
Our next stop would be the first coaster of the day, at least by my reckoning. Ignore this if you don’t count powered coasters! Gold Mine Train is your classic western mine train powered coaster. Again, it was extraordinarily presented with top-notch theming and signage. The ride itself isn’t particularly memorable, but once more, it makes fantastic use of its beautiful setting. It’s worth the ride for sure, but not one we’d rush to re-ride.
Now, if there’s one criticism I had to make of Nigloland, it would be the park layout. Whilst meandering around without a map was a lot of fun, it was made more challenging than it should have been by a multitude of dead ends, some of which contained some of the park’s best attractions! One of these was the park’s Disk’O coaster: Grizzli. These rides are so numerous, particularly in the UK, that it takes quite a lot for them to rank amongst my favourites at a park, but the setting of this ride is something else. Themed to, you guessed it, a grizzly bear, the ride vehicle swoops between – and over – trees on its way back and forth across the track. The actual ride itself isn’t particularly well-themed. There’s a very nice bear in the middle of the disk, but that’s about it. However, these trees add so much. Not only does the ride feel isolated, and not at all as if it’s at a theme park, but whisking over and past the branches makes the whole thing feel so fast… or maybe it just really was the fastest Disk’O I’ve ever ridden… either way, it’s great!
But, even better than this wonderful Disk’O is its neighbour, King of Mississippi. In a park famous for its… Disney-inspired… attractions, this was perhaps the most surprising of the bunch. For all the ‘Jungle Cruises’ and ‘Haunted Mansions’, it’s far less common for a park to have an enormous, functioning paddle steamer river cruise, but Nigloland does! In fact, this gorgeous sail around the park’s central river may well be even better than a cruise along the Rivers of America as, whilst there are no castle turrets in the distance, there is an on-board cafe and animatronic show! We’d gotten a very early start that morning and had already been on the go for hours at this point so just to sit, sail and watch the world go by cradling my €2.50 cup of tea and listening to the on-theme ragtime music felt like heaven.
Wandering through the woods, looking for our next attraction, we stumbled across Caravelles de Jacques Cartier, a very fancy name for a traditional circular boat ride, similar to Seastorm at Chessington or Jolly Buccaneer at Drayton Manor. Except, like so many things at Nigloland, this ride excelled. Sure, it’s not my favourite of these boats – I’m not sure any will ever beat Kolumbusjolle – but it’s sure up there for its magnificent centrepiece. These boats were instantly a must-ride as they sail repeatedly around a series of nautical hedgehog animatronics! There were hedgehog fishermen on all sides of this ride, and boy, did I get a crick in my neck from twisting to stare at them for the entire ride cycle!
Up until this point, we’d had a very relaxed morning hopping on whatever ride took our fancy as we meandered around the park, but despite having been forecast as a rainy day, the rain had thus far held and we began to realise we were pushing our luck a little. We really ought to go get some of those larger coasters ticked off whilst the going was good! So off we marched through the woods, passing Manoir Haunte – one of my most anticipated attractions at the park – looking absolutely magnificent for Nigloween, draped in a sea of cobwebs. Also on our journey was Donjon de L’Extreme, a horrifyingly tall drop tower built inside its own castle, adorably with a small bounce tower next door.
But we were on a mission to tick off the park’s signature coaster: Alpina Blitz. Billed to me as a ‘mini I305’, this wasn’t a coaster I was particularly excited for. There is no ride on this good earth that I despise more than I305 and this ride does share similarities. Namely, the fall from the initial drop straight into a bend and the associated positive Gs. Not that this is an Intamin creation. This is Mack’s version of that horrifying coaster, and thankfully, it is pretty darn fun! Whilst I305 focuses entirely on wanting you to know that the ride is trying to kill you, here you do actually get treated to some airtime hills. So, whilst the initial drop did feel intense (I greyed out slightly every time), the rest of the layout was fun enough to make me want to ride again and again. In fact, my only issue with this coaster was one that plagues a lot of Mack coasters, the ever-tightening lap bar. Though not as problematic as on some coasters (looking at you Copperhead Strike), the lap bars on this coaster did become tighter and tighter as the ride progressed, so don’t worry if you get stapled. There’s no way you’re reaching the brake run without being stapled anyway! But that’s honestly just about my only complaint. The ride’s station building is beautiful, the layout fun and the ride experience otherwise super comfortable. A very solid coaster!
Similar to Efteling, Nigloland’s most thrilling coasters can all be found in one corner. As such, our next stop would be Krampus Expedition, the park’s newest coaster, and the only one I’d followed construction of. This Mack water coaster is mostly known for its large Krampus sculpture arching over the ride’s finale. Though perhaps not in a good way…. whilst the concept art caught the imagination of enthusiasts worldwide – it was what put the park on the map for me – the final product wasn’t quite as spectacular. Thankfully, what the ride’s thematic centrepiece lacked, its queue more than made up for. Giving almost Expedition Everest vibes, the queue functioned as a museum featuring artefacts from a series of expeditions, including an enormous central Krampus skeleton. Most excitingly for enthusiasts, the queue also features a ‘best-of’ wall featuring the ride posters of rapids rides from all over the world. For me, this brought back a lot of happy memories as I’ve managed to visit all six of the featured parks (although only actually ridden four out of the six rapids rides!) Do let me know which ones you’ve ridden!
Sadly, the ride itself didn’t really do much. Water coasters are never my favourite, and this was no exception. Thankfully, being new, the coaster did ride pretty well, offering none of the jankiness found in its Europa-Park counterparts, but that’s about the only positive. Whilst it certainly wasn’t an offensive ride, we did get wet enough that it was certainly not worth a second ride just for the sake of it. I would have liked to have seen that queue again, though!
Thankfully, after what was a little bit of a disappointment, our next ride would take our expectations and knock them out of the park. Spatiale Experience is the park’s indoor coaster. Located in the only area of the park that felt a little tired, this 1950’s Americana area was a little sun-faded and in need of some love, and the enormous grey corrugated metal building that housed its centrepiece attraction was no exception. After spending a morning wandering through a forest filled with beautifully carved signage, this all felt a little ugly in comparison, a feeling that didn’t abate as we stood on an outdoor metal ramp that functioned as the queue.
Entering the station, things began to look up as we were met with a kitschy retro-futuristic station, making use of the classic combination of retro computing equipment and coloured lighting to make the guests feel as though they were about to jet off to space.
But still, at this point, we had very little idea of what we were in for. Hopping into the train, unfazed, unbothered, expecting a mild indoor coaster, we happily chatted as we dispatched and ascended the spiral lift hill, a spiral lift hill that felt like it lasted an eternity. Then the screaming began. Not my standard ‘wahoo!’ style of rollercoaster screaming, but scream-for-your-life, what-the-hell-is-happening-to-me screams. Spatiale Experience is unhinged. The entire ride feels as though it’s desperately attempting to launch you from the train, hurtling along at speeds that feel far faster than should be possible, quickly changing direction and throwing us from side to side so much we stopped trying to apologise to each other as our bodies slammed together. All the while, you zoom past spacemen, planets, and stars in true Space Mountain-esque Coaster style. This ride was glorious and instantly became a must-do re-ride. Appearances can be deceiving!
From here, we had just two more coasters to tick off, the first being Schlitt Express, a perfectly acceptable but otherwise unremarkable Mack Wilde Maus. Nicely presented, as with everything in this park, the ride certainly wasn’t as painful as some other wild mouse coasters, but was very much a one-and-done. However, our next stop would take us somewhere very special indeed, the Niglo Forest. Niglo Forest is the newest area of Nigloland, and the area of the park dedicated to rides for the younger guest. Of course, being the family area of an already adorable park, everything here is cute as hell. Perhaps none more-so than the area’s coaster, Noisette Express. As many will know, at least those of you prone to buying chocolate on holiday, noisette translates to hazelnut, and that is because this is a squirrel coaster. A moment please for the Noisette Express train.
But it’s not just the train that is squirrel-themed. The lights? Acorns. The floor? Full of squirrel footprints? The step-free access entrance? THE WHEELCHAIR HAS A SQUIRREL TAIL.
The ART Engineering coaster was perfectly enjoyable too for a kiddie coaster, with nice comfy seats and a long enough layout not to feel like we’d wasted our time (this was probably our longest wait of the day, it’s always the kid’s coasters!) Sailing through the gorgeously landscaped ride area also just made for a nice time. A pretty perfect kid’s coaster honestly.
Thankfully, Noisette Express was not the only painfully cute attraction in the land. My personal favourite being a small nearby tracked ride entitled Hérissons de la Forêt Magique and magique it was! After checking that we were allowed on the ride… the vehicles were tiny hedgehog cars… we’d each board a hedgehog and take a short journey through some beautifully landscaped gardens, but most importantly, past a series of scenes depicting animatronic hedgehogs living the high life in the alps. One hedgehog could be found milking their cows, another dressed for the alpine life, on a mountainside alongside their goats. Short, relatively basic in its execution, but absolutely flawless, this small kids ride is unmissable. A mark of the power of Nigloland. I really cannot remember the last time I visited a park where every single attraction felt like a must-do. Every attraction here has something that makes it special. We’d wrap up our time in the Niglo Forest by taking a flight upon L’Envol des Papillons (Flight of the Butterflies), a monorail-style attraction that offered aerial views of the land from beautiful butterfly-esque cars. Here it was the station building that made the ride special, the space was enormous, and located at what was designed to feel like a giant leaf. It was an adventure just heading to the platform!
The one thing I cannot really talk about at Nigloland is the food. We were in such a rush to get things done that I didn’t have time to track down a food outlet selling vegetarian options, instead just opting for something sweet from a (gorgeous) outlet selling meals that appealed to the rest of my group (unfortunately, these all contained something I couldn’t eat!) But, that’s no problem with me. A rule I live by is if you can eat pancakes for a meal, eat pancakes for a meal. And well, I didn’t manage pancakes either, but I did get a waffle and that’s close enough! So a waffle with nutella and cream for lunch it was, which was very reasonably priced and delicious. My group all enjoyed their options too, which were far healthier and more suited to lunch than mine! However, lunch did come with one enormous downside. The cider. I’d been ridiculously excited to see cider on the menu, I’m a sworn hater of beer and sadly that often seems to be the only option in mainland Europe. So, I leapt at the chance for a pint of my favourite casual drink. First things first, this was no pint. This cider came poured from a bottle that was suspiciously similar to a wine bottle, straight into what I would call a soda glass. It was gently sparkling and similar in colour to concentrated apple juice, but cloudy. Most importantly, the taste was… unpleasant. I’m not sure how apples are used in the process of producing british cider, but this tasted just like… green apples. It was so bitter! This was the second cider I’ve had a French theme park and both were like this, maybe it’s time to give up.
Despite being nearly undrinkable, I’d find myself downing the glass of cider however as we had places to be! One place in particular, in fact. The place that had brought us to this park, that had caused this entire trip. The Niglo Show.
Niglo Show is the stuff of legend. A cult icon within the theme park community. A show in which a group of animatronic niglos (hedgehogs) sing the words Niglo Show over and over, that was what I’d heard, that was all I knew. Now, I love animatronic shows. They are actually one of my favourite kinds of theme park attractions. Often, they are formed of singing animals, and I just find an inherent joy in watching these silly little robots perform a musical number. Animatronic shows used to be a common feature in theme parks and novelty restaurants across the globe, but seem to be slowly fading. As such, I was eager to reach Nigloland before, god forbid, Niglo Show should meet the same fate. So yes, I was going into this show excited. But, never did I ever imagine that Niglo Show would wipe the floor with my expectations. This attraction is spectacular. I say that not just as a lover of weird stuff, a lover of creaky old animatronics, and of theme park entertainment. This was a genuinely fantastic experience. Perhaps we just got lucky, but for our performance, the house was packed out with true Niglo Show fans. Every lyric was a sing-along, every character was applauded, the whole thing was a riot! There was also so much more to the show than I’d envisioned. There are talking moose, a buffalo playing the piano, and various hedgehogs from around the world. There’s just everything you could ever want from a show! #NigloShow4Eva
After a morning packed with the park’s coasters, we’d spend our afternoon enjoying the rest of the park’s unsubtle Disney Parks rip-offs. Of course, this had gotten off to a fantastic start with perhaps the most obvious of them all, the Country Bear Jamboree ‘inspired’ Niglo Show. Next up, we’d journey into Manoir Hante (translated: Haunted Mansion). While Nigloland had gone to town on the entire park for Nigloween, nowhere was this more apparent than in the exterior queue of Manoir Hante, which had been transformed into nothing short of an enormous spider web.
Venturing through the tangles of web, we eventually reached an ivy-laden show building. Tucked away behind the trees, it really felt as though we’d discovered this building, lying in wait for visitors, a perfectly eerie start to a spooky attraction!
The ride itself was, well, it was a Haunted Mansion rip-off, featuring many direct cut-and-paste scenes, and some that were clearly inspired by, but with one key difference (budget aside): the ride vehicles. I loved these vehicles! I’ve never seen anything quite like them. There’s a dark ride at Europa-Park that is often referred to as ‘bench ride’, but really, this is the true bench ride! You’re literally just riding on this bench-like chair on a moving platform. I love it! The bench has a few tricks up its sleeve along the way, too. By no means is this one of the best spooky dark rides out there, but I enjoyed it very much!
Country Bear Jamboree? Check. Rivers of America? Check. Space Mountain? Check. The Haunted Mansion? Check. There was just one more iconic ride left to replicate: The Jungle Cruise. (Though you could certainly argue the ancestry of Nigloland Circuit!) Here named Africa Cruise, the boat ride once more follows the same beats as Jungle Cruise, but, as usual with these regional replica attractions, without the skipper providing commentary. Instead, we’d pass the obligatory animal animatronics in silence, except for the sound effects of each respective scene. Scenes that were very familiar, with some ripped straight from Marc Davis’ sketchbook. As with many Disney rip-off attractions, this was a very solid ride on its own merit, though, and the animatronics were well-kept and varied. But, really? The guys up the tree?!
Of all the attractions at Nigloland, there’s one that doesn’t quite fit in. Amongst all the quirky charm of the place, the little hedgehog animatronics and beautiful planting lies the 5th tallest drop-tower in the world, Donjon de l’Extrême. The park’s website actually claims that Donjon de l’Extrême is the tallest rotating free-fall drop tower in the world, but I believe that Highlander at Hansa Park is the same model and taller? Perhaps they’re not counting ones with tilting seats! Either way, it’s really bloody tall! I can never quite work out how I feel about drop towers. Sometimes I love them, sometimes I hate them. Highlander made me feel a little ill, but the smaller Intamin towers (RIP Apocalypse) are brilliant fun. Perhaps it was just the tilting seats on Highlander that were the issue, however, as Donjon was really enjoyable! Offering incredible views over the resort and the surrounding countryside, the drop was forceful enough to be enjoyable without making me revisit my breakfast. If you don’t quite fancy journeying 344 feet above the park, within the same beautiful castle complex, you’ll find Tour des Petits Fantômes, a family bounce tower. Don’t let the small size fool you. These bounce towers (the kind found at both LEGOLAND Windsor and Paultons Park) are great fun!
With just 90 minutes left in the park, it was time to prioritise some re-rides and our final attractions. In this time, we managed to squeeze in re-rides on Alpina Blitz, Spatiale Experience, a lap on the railroad, and finally, frantically, a visit to Eden Palais. With about 2 minutes until park closing time, we found ourselves running, literally running, to the park’s 1928 carousel. We’d spotted the thing as we queued for the train and decided that it looked too beautiful to miss, and thankfully, the train seemed to agree, dropping us back by the park entrance just in time. This might be the only time in my life that I’ve run for a carousel, but it was definitely the right decision. Fitted with glittering lights and an original carousel organ, this was a work of art and a fitting end to our day at this magical park. Little did we know that inside of the building housing the ride was an entire museum dedicated to the history of Nigloland, including a short film. Though the park was closed, the film was still counting down to its next performance, so we made our way over, gazing at the models of rides that had previously occupied the site over the preceding century.
Nigloland is a park with a rich history, with many a fairground having called the site home before the opening of the park itself in 1987, and this exhibition made for the perfect finale for our day at this remarkable place.
Nigloland is a phenomenal theme park. Whilst, on paper, it has no earth-shattering rides, the park excels in making every single attraction a memorable experience. The park was pristine, beautifully landscaped and filled with very friendly staff. It’s certainly not the easiest park in the world to get to, but I know for sure that I’ll be returning. I just think it will have to be at Nigloween proper because lord, this park knows how to decorate for Halloween.
Speak again soon,
Claire
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